On Getting Better…
I have had 3 or 4 nights of good sleep in a row. Kewpie says I am more like myself. Things are definitely slowing down. I feel mellow.
I am so grateful to be where I am right now. I was afraid I would never get here. In the end I didn’t lose much this time around. If anything, I gained some insight.
I felt like I lost some friends, but in retrospect, I just learned who was for real and who wasn’t. I am about to learn some more too. I gained a few friends during this mania. Now that I am not manic anymore I will get to see if they still like me or not when I am stable.
I like to think that when I am manic I am just a more extreme version of myself. Chris says that I am not myself at all. I don’t know how true that is. I no longer ruminate over this “loss” of friendship. Other then thinking about it for this blog post, I really hadn’t thought about it much at all. Friendship is a hard concept for me sometimes. I guess all I can do is keep being me and see what happens.